Truth be told I've been somewhat negligent in writing much lately.
That's because I've been in prison.
Well no, although I recently watched a show about this horrific penitentiary in Siberia - yes - actual Siberia, where they stick Russia's most reviled...you know, cannibals, serial killers and any member of a Russian hockey team who's lost an international gold medal game. I think it would actually be kind of fun to visit this joint. Just let everyone out of their cages into one big gen pop room and fuel everyone up with the hardest vodka you can find. Who knows - just put a few hundred maniacs together and maybe they'd come up with something great. And just for shits and giggles, I'd lower a prostititute into the room on a platform like they did with that goat in Jurassic Park..let nature take its course.
Anyway I digress. The point is that I haven't written much lately because I've been laptopless. Mine has slithered off this mortal coil, and I must admit, it's been strange which illustrates just how much we've become addicted to the interwebs and such. And speaking of addiction, the downfall of my laptop can be directly linked to that online game I've played for the last year or so, Tanki Online. Several months ago I got annoyed playing it and closed the cover of the computer a little too aggressively, which jarred the latch mechanism, eventually leading to the wiring getting screwed up, leaving the keys useless.
The good news (or bad, depending on your perspective) is that I've ordered a new laptop and it will arrive shortly. This way I can resume regular contributions to the blog along with producing new episodes of Hobo Gauntlet Radio.
Until then, I'll just remind you sons of bitches who talk on cell phones while in a lineup at Tim Horton's that the world doesn't revolve around you, and holding up 9 other people behind you at 8:45am on a Monday makes you a prime candidate for a public shaming at best, and a moderately poisonous blow dart to the neck at worst. Smarten the fuck up.
That's because I've been in prison.
Well no, although I recently watched a show about this horrific penitentiary in Siberia - yes - actual Siberia, where they stick Russia's most reviled...you know, cannibals, serial killers and any member of a Russian hockey team who's lost an international gold medal game. I think it would actually be kind of fun to visit this joint. Just let everyone out of their cages into one big gen pop room and fuel everyone up with the hardest vodka you can find. Who knows - just put a few hundred maniacs together and maybe they'd come up with something great. And just for shits and giggles, I'd lower a prostititute into the room on a platform like they did with that goat in Jurassic Park..let nature take its course.
Anyway I digress. The point is that I haven't written much lately because I've been laptopless. Mine has slithered off this mortal coil, and I must admit, it's been strange which illustrates just how much we've become addicted to the interwebs and such. And speaking of addiction, the downfall of my laptop can be directly linked to that online game I've played for the last year or so, Tanki Online. Several months ago I got annoyed playing it and closed the cover of the computer a little too aggressively, which jarred the latch mechanism, eventually leading to the wiring getting screwed up, leaving the keys useless.
The good news (or bad, depending on your perspective) is that I've ordered a new laptop and it will arrive shortly. This way I can resume regular contributions to the blog along with producing new episodes of Hobo Gauntlet Radio.
Until then, I'll just remind you sons of bitches who talk on cell phones while in a lineup at Tim Horton's that the world doesn't revolve around you, and holding up 9 other people behind you at 8:45am on a Monday makes you a prime candidate for a public shaming at best, and a moderately poisonous blow dart to the neck at worst. Smarten the fuck up.
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